food related injury and "wait animation"

Last night, while playing a fairly intense video game, I made the mistake of eating some pretzels. And I'm not talking about the tamed "Mr. Pretzel with his arms folded" variety. No, I'm talking about the harpoons of salty death. The kind that, if you grab a handful, there's no way you'll be able to get them anywhere near your mouth without puncturing your cheek.

With a little maneuvering and not a lot of sense (remember, I was distracted by a video game) I managed to get far too many pretzels in my mouth. And then something terrible happened. Through some quirk of fate, one of the aforementioned harpoons of salty death slid under my tongue and stabbed the underside of it. You know, that part that connects the underside of your tongue to the floor of your mouth? Yeah, that part.

Let's start with "ouch" and move on from there. My video game character nearly died, but fortunately she's feisty and runs away pretty well. I managed to retreat until the throbbing in my mouth died down to a dull ache (which is still there today).

And then, because I'm a guy and I had the muchies - I had another handful and got back to my game.

Yeah, I'm an idiot. In my defense, I was more careful - but a thinking and rational person would have thrown out the pretzels and opened up a container of yogurt.

And to add insult to injury (literally) - the game insulted me. See, way back in the day, there was a game called "Sonic the Hedgehog". And if you let the controller sit idle for too long, Sonic would turn slightly toward you, glare, and tap his foot impatiently.

Well, in Balder's Game: Dark Alliance 2 - the concept of an impatient character went a little too far. While I was recovering from the self-harpooning, my character on the screen thought I'd waited too long and said:

"If I have to wait here much longer, I'm going to strangle you with that controller cord"

And my response to that was: "Yikes! Okay, okay, give me a second".

Of course she didn't respond, but she did stop grumbling at me.

And that was pretty much my evening.

Back to work...